so basically my new promotion has really been kicking my ass. i've always been into herbs and minerals but now that i HAVE to learn it all and fast, i just can't retain any information. especially since i have so many things going on in my head... i've always been told i live in my head, couldn't feel more true these days. my new favorite thing to do lately is mope around my apartment, eat tons of fruit, actually cooking meals instead of getting take-out, smoking, smoking on my fire escape, smoking in the park, laying in the park avoiding crusties/bums, people watching, writing, walking aimlessly while listening to yann tiersen and not sleeping. i've been smoking more than ever lately. it sucks but i feel like its helping me cope with work and other shit so whatever. i keep re-living seeing bolt thrower, it's a problem.